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“When you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.” ― Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You’ll Go! Some of us may call it feeling stuck, in a weird space, out of it, low on energy, or funky. A slump is the feeling(s) that come with being unmotivated and/or unexplainably uninterested in things that you normally are. It's this process in your internal environment where everything goes from being bright and vivid to gray and dull eventually impacting your external environment as well. A slump is not to be confused with burnout. Here is the difference:
Burnout-a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress. It occurs when you feel overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and unable to meet the constant demands of work, home, and/or community.
Slump- a depressive episode that impacts the way you think, behave, and feel and can lead to a range of emotional and physical problems. Symptoms can range from loss of energy and appetite to feelings of emptiness and difficulty making decisions.
Burnout is exclusively caused by stress and a slump or depressive episode can be brought on by many reasons including stress such as unresolved/suppressed emotions, illness, and other personal problems to name a few. But whenever you may find yourself in a slump, I have got just the thing for you and not only are you going to come out of this feeling of being stuck and un-slump yourself but you are going to expand in awareness of yourself, grow in patience with yourself, and become more present in your daily life.
Are you not feeling 'yourself?'
Sometimes we may say to ourselves and others when we are in a slump, 'I'm just not feeling myself' But is it possible that you are feeling yourself only the feelings have changed? What I mean by this is, that when we embrace the vastness of being human we realize that this includes low-vibrational feelings and emotions such as sadness, dismay, scared, and lonely as well as high-vibrational feelings such as happiness, joy, gratitude, and amusement. This brings me to the first step of un-slumping yourself.
1. Embrace all that you are feeling. When we experience discomfort that is overwhelming or crosses the threshold of what we can take, our immediate response is resistance. But if we shift this response and instead of resisting our true feelings, we face them, allowing our whole being to be at one with the experience of the slump and the feelings associated with it, we expand in self-awareness and elevate our ability to self-regulate on a high level.
Make room for the slump by either taking some time off or scheduling a series of half-days whichever you feel you need. Connect with your village, including stakeholders such as your partner, children, team, and close friends. Discuss potential opportunities for their assistance during this period, and delegate tasks wherever possible, even where you find it challenging to do so. Those of you who wear the 'All By Myself' or 'If I Don't Do It No One Will' badge know exactly what I mean. Delegate scared, Sis. You got this.
Now that you have created space for yourself, what's next? Embracing all that we are feeling allows us to just be. Don't overthink this. Meditation, alone time in nature, walking barefoot, a long herbal bath, a day trip to the beach (lake, pond, river, or stream), or yoga are nonstimulative self-regulatory activities that boost your mood, calm the body, and encourage clarity. Your emotions even if several, will become more clear and that's all you need for now, to know where you are. Clarity, calmness, and an increase in energy (even if just a little) are important to gain before moving to the next step. In addition to the nonstimulative activities of step one, we begin flowing into step two.
2. Be intentional in exploring your slump. We have accepted that we are officially in a slump and created space for it. Just in case you missed it, here is an opportunity to celebrate yourself! Creating space deserves the celebration. We are allowing ourselves to just be without feeling like there is a 'Slump To-Do List' to tackle and our whole being is at one with our emotions. When you're clear on what emotions you're experiencing and where you are, it's time to explore them with the intention of digging deeper to uncover more of yourself, discover unmet needs, and reveal threatened beliefs. Emotions stimulate thoughts, thoughts shape beliefs, and beliefs drive behavior. This can also be experienced in reverse.
Observe and study yourself. Journal your thoughts, any beliefs that are self-limiting, and behaviors that could be a result of the emotions that are making their way through you. Journaling is a great tool to study yourself and to get more familiar with yourself in a depressive episode. Think of it like discovering the symptoms (characteristics) of this version of yourself.
Do not judge your thoughts, beliefs, behaviors, or whatever you may find. This is counterproductive and stimulates more low-vibrational emotions.
Keep in mind the resources available to you during this process. Therapy, emotional wellness resources like SenterME, and your village partners (partner, parent, close friend/sibling) can help you explore yourself by being an anchor of support. Purpose questions also help dig deeper getting us closer to our truth, the suppressed emotions, unmet needs, and threatened beliefs. Such questions sound like:
What opportunities are there for me to spend more quality time with myself regularly?
What investments am I making in my emotional well-being and how often?
How do I perceive the importance of prioritizing my emotional wellness?
When am I taking time to process my emotions and Keep it R.E.A.L. to prevent unhealthy compartmentalization and emotion suppression?
Self-exploration requires honesty and transparency and in doing so you strengthen the trust in yourself and your ability to accept yourself unconditionally. Now that you are more familiar with this version of yourself, thoughts, beliefs, behaviors, and symptoms, it's time to flow into step three.
Do you often neglect or avoid your needs?
I get it, as a mom, bootstrapping entrepreneur, and household manager, it can be almost second nature to put my needs on the back burner. But as I grow in emotional wellness I become more aware of my core needs, the space I require, and what it takes to regulate Charlotte on a high level. We don't intentionally neglect our needs, what's happening in most cases, we simply make decisions on our needs from a space of scarcity. If we don't feel or believe we have the time, energy, or space to prioritize ourselves, we won't.
3. Create harmony by meeting your needs. In step two we recognized the symptoms of the version of ourselves in a slump, the Slumped Me. We identified unmet needs, threatened beliefs, and behaviors. Now, it's time to treat ourselves with harmony a prescription for yourself that only you can write. When we respond to ourselves by meeting our needs this creates balance and harmonizes our internal and external environment. Existing in harmony with yourself is a sure way of achieving work-life harmony, attracting healthy and supportive relationships, maintaining boundaries, consistency in your mood, and living authentically.
Sometimes we slump because we have spent so much time alone in our home office that we need to prescribe ourselves quality time with loved ones. Sometimes we slump because we spend more time networking, directing, and meeting after meeting that we need to prescribe ourselves quality time alone.
Sometimes we slump because we haven't played, grieved, created, released, or faced our resistance head-on. Sometimes we slump because of fear. Meeting our needs is a brave and empowering step of un-slumping ourselves. It may trigger guilt or even shame but prioritizing yourself and meeting your needs instantly improves the quality of your expression, reduces stress, and energizes you. You grow in awareness of yourself and responsibility for yourself.
4. Be patient. The last step of un-slumping isn't necessarily a step but more of a guideline that helps you throughout this process. Too often we set expectations on ourselves to be machines that only require step-by-step instructions to maintain when the truth of the matter is, a machine could never hold a candle next to your divine design. There are so many layers to being human and in our society being woman is magnificently more elaborate. I may be biased.
Considering the glory of woman, the gateway to human life, masterful in leadership, and nurturer in building community, projects, businesses, and homes, it is necessary to be patient with yourself. It literally took the stars to align for you to be here. Space was first created for you, there was intention in your design, and to ensure that you always remember that you have everything you need, you are surrounded with and attract abundance naturally. Being patient with yourself is a form of self-love and self-preservation.
Patience with yourself is knowing and standing in your worthiness.
Tips to encourage growth in patience with yourself are:
Affirm yourself daily
Breathe deeply daily
Choose small things like 'spilled milk' to let go of easily and flow
Journal at least weekly
Prioritize balance
|* Notice that I do not give a specific time frame for how long this could last, everyone is different so it is essential that you equip yourself with grace during this process.
This journey we call life is a series of ups and downs, and slumps never cease to happen as they are necessary for growing in presence. You'll find that un-slumping yourself is truly not easily done, but growing in self-awareness enables you to engage more of yourself in your daily life, and what better feeling than the enjoyment of self meets greater daily fulfillment? You are deserving of a life that is kind, gentle, and peaceful and it begins with you.
When was the last time you were in a slump? How did you un-slump? Share your experience below in the comments and share with a friend you feel will enjoy this article as well.
Remember, wellness is your birthright and self-love is true freedom.
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